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Monday, October 24, 2005

Security Cadre - The Road Ahead

With the recruitment of 27 officers in Grade 'A' which will be undertaken shortly, the strength of our cadre will swell up to 115 from the present 88. The gradewise distribution after taking into account the recent 18 promotiions from Grade 'A' to 'B' will be as follows :

Grade----No. of Posts--- % of Total
--'A'-----------65-----------56.5
--'B'-----------40-----------34.8
--'C'-----------05------------4.3
--'D'-----------04------------3.5 *
--'E'-----------01-------------.9

(NB 1.* one post not yet filled.
2.Kindly ignore the dashes in between the figures, these are courtesy formatting errors.)

The impact of the above mentioned figures can be better felt when they are seen on a pie or a column chart. Instead of a pyramidical structure what do we have here ?? I have no idea what this figure should be called. A whopping 91.3 % of the officers will be Grade 'A' and 'B'. So where will these blokes go thereafter ?? End of the road man !! Whither goest thou ?? Quo Vadis ??? Start praying and meanwhile keep braying too. Maybe the powers that be will relent after listening to your combined cry.

Posts on Security - II

Watch Your Step Around This Security Device
(This post has been reproduced from a mail sent to me by Toms)

Finnish scientists have created a security system for mobile phones, laptops and other electronic devices, based on identifying the owners' walking styles.The new technology is being tested by Helsinki-based VTT Technical Research Centre, CNN reports. Its creators say it could be commercially available within three years, and may prevent millions of portable appliances being stolen every year.Research professor Heikki Ailisto told CNN that the system involved fitting electronic devices with sensors, which monitored their owners' walking styles. Because devices such as mobile phones and PDAs were often kept in pockets or on belt clips, the sensors actively monitor the way the owner walks when the device is used for the first time.The measurements are saved in the sensor's memory and the sensors then monitor the walking style of anyone who carries the device. "The acceleration sensor measures the frequency of your steps and how high your step is," Ailisto says."It learns your walking style in the first day. If the walking style is similar enough, then you are the rightful owner of the device. If it strongly decides this has been stolen, then it will lock the device and ask you for a password."Ailisto says the identification method came about when two researchers, one who worked in biometrics and another in human motion and fitness, worked together to come up with the idea.Previous security systems that used a person's movements to identify them had involved closed circuit television monitors, whereas the Finnish system was based on advanced computation, Ailisto concludes.

Thursday, October 20, 2005

Promotion Interviews "Grade A to B"

Hi Folks,
I have had an opportunity to talk to most of the guys who faced the promotion interviews at Mumbai on 18th and 19th October 2005. All of them were sounding pretty satisfied with their performances. This was the best time for all these guys to face the interview as only 19 guys were interviewed for 18 vacancies. They sure are lucky blokes !!! Well here's wishing them all success and glory. Congrats to all.

Yet Another Interesting Mail Forward

Management : The Story of 8 Monkeys
(This is based on an actual experiment conducted in U.K.)
Put eight monkeys in a room. In the middle of the room is a ladder, leading to a bunch of bananas hanging from a hook on the ceiling. Each time a monkey tries to climb the ladder, all the monkeys are sprayed with ice water, which makes them miserable. Soon enough, whenever a monkey attempts to climb the ladder, all of the other monkeys, not wanting to be sprayed, set upon him and beat him up. Soon, none of the eight monkeys ever attempts to climb the ladder.

One of the original monkeys is then removed, and a new monkey is put in the room. Seeing the bananas and the ladder, he wonders why none of the other monkeys are doing the obvious. But undaunted, he immediately begins to climb the ladder. All the other monkeys fall upon him and beat him silly. He has no idea why. However, he no longer attempts to climb the ladder.

A second original monkey is removed and replaced. The newcomer again attempts to climb the ladder, but all the other monkeys hammer the crap out of him. This includes the previous new monkey, who, grateful that he's not on the receiving end this time, participates in the beating because all the other monkeys are doing it. However, he has no idea why he's attacking the new monkey.

One by one, all the original monkeys are replaced. Eight new monkeys are now in the room. None of them have ever been sprayed by ice water. None of them attempt to climb the ladder. All of them will enthusiastically beat up any new monkey who tries, without having any idea why.
This is how any company's policies get Established.

Sunday, October 16, 2005

Lungar Gupp IV

Hi folks,
Firstly, here's wishing all the best to the guys who are going to face the interviews at Mumbai on 18 and 19 October. Give it your best shot !!
Secondly, have you all heard about one obnoxious character being dumped into the cold storage ?? Ahhh !! That was sweet music to the ears. No prizes for guessing.
Thirdly, for those of us who get carried away by the latest circular regarding revision of designations - do remember to have two sets of visiting cards printed (one for OUTSIDERS and one for INSIDERS) and keep them separately in boxes duly marked thus. Remember if you get caught mixing up the two or try to pull off a smart act by giving away only the "FALSE" designation visiting cards to everyone - you will be PROSECUTED TO THE FULL EXTENT UNDER THE STAFF REGULATIONS.

"Barsati" Designation

Hi Guys,
Have you all seen the new circular regarding revision of designations of Security officers ?? I got a copy from our friends at Mumbai and am still at a loss for words to describe my consternation. I am amazed at how the Bank expects us to adopt such double standards. This bolt out of the blue really takes the cake as far as wierd decisions taken by our wise policy makers is concerned. Imagine a situation where one presents his visiting card to an outsider declaring him to be an AGM (P&S) and the outsider lands up at the Bank at a later date to meet him only to learn that the guy is er! oh!! ahem!!! a Manager (P&S). The visitor would be too embarrassed to even discuss the issue but would surely bring it to the notice of his friends about the fraud being perpetrated by Security Officers of RBI. I hope this latest circular is not a fallout of the representation sent by RD, Chennai about our career progression. If so, then the message is clear - "you can have the pay and perks of an AGM and you can even lie about your designation (only to outsiders) BUT YOU WILL NOT BE GIVEN THE DESIGNATION BEING DEMANDED BY YOU".

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

National Pride

Guys !! This is yet another mail forward which I came across and felt I must share it with you all.

Dear Friends,

Here is a personal experience, as well as a moment of national pride, which I want to share with you. Hope you find it worth the time you put in reading it :
"In the middle of 1965 India-Pakistan war, US govt - then a close friend of Pakistan - threatened India with stopping food-aid (remember "PL-480"?). For a food deficient India this threat was serious and humiliating. So much so that in the middle of war, Prime Minister (Late) Lal Bahadur Shastri went to Ram Leela Grounds in Delhi and appealed to each Indian to observe one-meal-fast every week to answer the American threat. As a school boy, I joined those millions who responded to Shastri ji's call.
I continued the fast even when the war was over and India became self sufficient in food. Hurt deep by the national humiliation suffered at the hands of the US govt, I had vowed to stop my weekly fast only when India starts giving aid to USA.
It took just 40 years. Last week THE day arrived. When Indian ambassador in Washington DC handed over a cheque of US$ 50 million to the US govt, two plane loads of food, medical aid and other relief materials were waiting to fly to the USA. Time to break the fast? With no bad feeling about the USA, and good wishes for the Katrina victims, this humble Indian feels proud of the distance India has covered in 40 years. Let's celebrate a New India!"
- Vijay Kranti.
Dean - IIT Madras

Positive Thinking

12 Steps to a Positive Attitude ( This dose is required in view of the bleak and uncertain future we are facing today)

More than 100 years ago, author Robert Louis Stevenson offered the following tips for maintaining a positive attitude. They still apply today.

1· Make up your mind to be happy. Learn to find pleasure in simple things.
2· Make the best of your circumstances. Everyone has problems. The trick is to make laughter outweigh the tears.
3· Don’t take yourself too seriously. Don’t think that somehow you should be protected from misfortunes that befall others.
4· You can’t please everybody. Don’t let criticism worry you.
5· Don’t let your neighbor set your standards. Be yourself.
6· Do the things you enjoy doing, but stay out of debt.
7· Don’t borrow trouble. Imaginary burdens are harder to bear than the actual ones.
8· Hate poisons the soul, so don’t carry grudges. Avoid people who make you unhappy.
9· Have many interests. If you can’t travel, read about new places.
10·Don’t hold post-mortems. Don’t spend your life brooding over sorrows and mistakes. 11· Do what you can for those less fortunate than yourself.
12· Keep busy at something. A busy person never has time to be unhappy.